Thursday, December 31, 2009

Good Bye 2009!

For a lot of people 2009 has been a crappy year. For me...nope, it's been awesome. I had some probs with the whole pregnancy thing toward the end, but now I have a fantastic little blond baby. Mama's Angel from Heaven. Yeah, I know I'm a sap. Can't help it, the 5 year old isn't as nearly as huggy as he used to be. This one is gonna be tortured with love til he can't take it any more. I've been lucky enough to stay home too. Not something I'd ever thought I'd do. A Stay at Home Mom? Housewife? Not me. I actually like it. (Most of the time! If I had a wife, it would be perfect! wink wink!) My 5 year old T is a cool kid. Sometimes a smart ass like Mommy but sweet and very good natured. The Husb is patient and hard working. He's an awesome Dad and knows when to take over so I don't go crazy. I don't know how I was lucky enough to snag him.

I hope the coming year brings you happiness, health, love and tolerance. I'd like a bunch of each please! Happy 2010 my Bloggy friends! I have enjoyed reading about your ups and downs and everyday dilemmas. You keep me smiling and wondering! Happy New Year!

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Where am I?

Seriously, it's snowing in Dallas again. WTH? It sometimes snows maybe once or twice a year but not until February. It's just plain weird. Sure is pretty though. Well since it's just after Christmas the baby has gotten his first sickness. Went to the doctor yesterday after a horrible night. Not the flu, not an ear infection...just the crud. Lovely. I just realized why I'm not a nurse. I don't do puke, I don't do sickness. It's so sad when he can't even say, "Hey Mom, I feel like shit. I can't breath thru my nose." That would be nice. It would also be nice if he'd let me suck his snot out with that bulb thing. That's a hell no from him. Poor guy is already in bed and it's not even 5pm. Wonder what kind of night we'll have. Sure do miss those Europe layovers right now.

Speaking of flying. What the hell is wrong with people? Trying to blow up a Delta flight???? Since I work for Delta, I find that entirely too close for comfort. Entirely. The Government needs to pull their head out of their ass concerning security. Not to be a bitch or to profile, but if someone is on a watch list and they don't live in the states, why o' why do you not revoke their VISA? Why do they need to come here? To hang out? The guys Dad even said he was going to be a problem. HELLOOOOO!!!!

Well, I'm off to watch the snow. It relaxes me (and a GIANT glass of wine). After the last few days with a fussy baby, I am ready to chill. Oh, nix that...the baby is crying. Shit.

Thursday, December 24, 2009

Hail the Might State!

Merry Christmas from the state of Texas! Yesterday it was 76 degrees in Dallas. We had the screen door open blasting Christmas music! Today....looks like it might be a white Christmas! 32 degrees and it's suppose to get down to 23 degrees. Blizzard "like" warnings of blowing snow. WTH? Hey baby, it's TEXAS...if ya don't like the weather, just wait a minute!

Have a wonderful holiday! Hugs those near and dear...just don't strangle! HoHoHo, The GDL

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Two Sleeps til Christmas!

I've always loved Christmas. No matter what life has thrown my way, I refuse to let Christmas be ruined. Growing up, I never realized how much I would of loved to wake up at home Christmas morning. We always went to our Grandparents though. Sometimes to my Dad's parents before my parents divorced. When I was about 7, on the way home from Christmas at the farm, my Mother told us she and Daddy were getting divorced. From then on, we spent Christmas at my Mom's parents in Muskogee Oklahoma and then that night we would drive to Missouri to be with my Dad and Grandparents. Like clock work...every year. You might think that is a little sad, but I made the best of it. I looked at it as two of everything. All the poor other kids got jipped. My Grandmother Junie would have loads of gifts. Every year my Paw Paw would give her $500 cash. He'd hide it in the Christmas tree. One year she couldn't find it. She ripped that tree apart. Looked at every ornament. My Paw Paw had a funny sense of humor. That year he tricked her and didn't put it on the tree. We laughed at that forever. The year after my sister got married, "Santa" aka Junie filled our stockings. My sister got a pair of granny panties and I got a pair of sexy panties. Sister said, "Hey, I'm the one that's married"...and Junie said, "Exactly! Niki needs the sexy ones!"
Fast forward to when I got a job as a Flight Attendant. I worked Christmas forever. My Grandmother Junie once told me, "Christmas is not a day, it's a season". We'd celebrate whenever I wasn't flying, making our Christmas day whenever it fit. Nothing was going to get my Christmas down! The longer I flew, the more of the holidays I got off. Five years ago I had my first son a week or so before Thanksgiving. That same Christmas Eve my Dad died. You'd think that might put a damper on my Christmas spirit. (Yeah..ya think!) At his funeral, a friend of his did a eulogy. He said that God gave my Dad the greatest gift by taking him on Christmas Eve. I'll always remember that. Tomorrow is not only Christmas Eve, but the life and celebration of an awesome guy, my Daddy. The man was funny and charming. He lived life to the fullest. He was happy. Not even his death can ruin Christmas. We all do things around the holidays that we'd rather not. We all goes places and endure traditions that makes us crazy. Some of us even drink to get thru them! ;) (!) But in the end the joy in my kids eyes, the laughter and making fun of tradition are all worth it. Merry Christmas!

Monday, December 21, 2009

Hurry Up Ho!

The house is decorated, the packages are wrapped, the stocking stuffers are waiting to be stuffed. I'm ready to get on with it already! This morning before 7am Mr. T was singing "We Wish You a Merry Christmas". Yeah...we're all in the spirit. So come on already! I was never good at waiting. I'm the one that wants to open some gifts on Christmas Eve. Good thing we are having the Husbs family over then. Otherwise he'd give me hell....cause I'd let the kid open at least one gift. My Grandmother Mammy was the same way. She hated waiting. She ALWAYS let us open a gift. Of course she also would get up in the middle of the night and carefully unwrapped her presents to see what she got. She was quite good at re-wrapping them. Sneaky Lady. I loved her! She was not the best cook, but us kids totally dug the things she did around the holidays. She always had homemade cookies. The one thing she did really well was homemade noodles. The cousins all used to fight over who got the most. My favorite thing of all was these red and green sandwiches Mammy made. Somehow she used to get red and green white bread. She'd dye cream cheese to match and make cream cheese sandwiches. As an adult the thought of eating a red cream cheese sandwich makes me want to puke. As a was awesome. Awwww Christmas time!

Saturday, December 19, 2009

What the heck?

Ok Blogger Buddies, I got a comment from my last post that has me perplexed. WTH?

"Dear Author ! I can not participate now in discussion - it is very occupied. But I will be released - I will necessarily write that I think"

It's from anonymous. What the hell? Is this something that normally happens? Weird people or what? Don't make me go all Ninja on you man!

Friday, December 18, 2009

Show me the money!

I created a gambling man. My 5 year old loves scratch off lotto tickets. Oh no. Is this horrible? I actually like them too. Love to win money. We hardly ever win money. Waaawaaaa. The Gambling Man begs to go over to that big green machine when we are at the store. Awww, Texas State Lotto! I try and control ourselves so we don't waste a bunch of money. You know why...because who actually wins more than $2? I usually give the kid $2-$3 to buy $1 scratch offs. Once he gets them, he holds them tight until we get to the car. We then pick out our luckiest coin and scratch away. Then... NADA! NOTHING! ZILCH! Damn scratch offs. The Husb a.k.a. Santa puts them in our Christmas stockings! Love that. I've always been tempted to bring them to our friends Christmas Party gift exchange. But what if someone won $1000 off one. I'd be jealous and ticked I hadn't scratched it. I guess the Husb knows that if I win $25,000 off a stocking stuffer that it's "all in the family"! Or is it? Baaaahahaha!

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Christmas card...

So I just finished stamping my Christmas cards. Good gosh...what a pain in the ass. I usually am so on top of things. I get them out at the very least the week after Thanksgiving. I don't know if it's having another baby or not really giving a shit that has made them "late" this year. OK, not late..but late by my gauge. I probably sent out about 75. Now let's do the math. Each card cost 26 cents. Each stamp cost 44 cents. That's 70 cents each. Times that by 75. Yes my mathematical friends, I spent $52.50 on Christmas cards. I once told someone that I was going to stop sending out cards to those that don't reciprocate. She said..."But I love getting cards!" Here's the do I! I guess if you really think about it, that would be crappy. The point of these cards are to spread good cheer. Not because you get something in return. Right? Yeah, sure. I will say I have a guy friend that doesn't do cards but it's always nice to go to his house and see your kids on his refrigerator. Heck, it'll be August and they are still there. Kinda gives you warm fuzzies that he cares. So Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays or whatever you prefer! Cards are out baby!

Tuesday, December 15, 2009


My cat stole my Snuggie.

Monday, December 14, 2009

Post Party!

So I went to my friends Christmas party on Saturday. She and her Husb have had forever. Years I tell ya. About 10 years ago our token gay friends brought a gag gift for the gift exchange. Prince Rainbow Ken...ya know, a gay Barbie doll dude. Anywho, he comes back every year. In the beginning he'd actually have some cool stuff with him. Like a nice bottle of wine, a fondue pot. You get the idea. Well my friends neighbors have got him 3 out of the last seven years. Needless to say...they are getting a bit pissy about it. So this year, not using the brain God gave him, instead of stealing a bottle of Crown Royal, the Husb takes a chance and picks from under the tree. Can you say "STUPID"? Guess what he picks? Yep... Rainbow Ken. The pissy neighbors include a lovely bottle of Boones Farm (cheap ass wine) and a card that has a dissertation written on the damn thing. The Husb refused to read it and just said, "Just give me the damn doll, I'm not reading this Christmas letter." Apparently they added a Barbie this year cause Ken got married. Their humor is lacking. Just my (and several others) opinion. Hey, It's GAY Ken!!!

Later, I was talking about how Ken may just come back next year naked in a crockpot with a bottle of champagne. I was told by a few friends..."OH NO, you can't take him out of the box, he'll lose value". Like in 10 years or so we're gonna sell the bastard and all go on a cruise. Yeah, like maybe in 50 years he might be worth something. Of course these people have never actually gotten Ken. I offered to swap gifts if they didn't want him removed from the box. I got no takers!

I've decided to put a little twist on things this next year. Ken is most definitely coming out of the closet. I go back to flying in June. For those that haven't read my bio, I'm a flight attendant. I fly Europe when I work. This is the plan, Ken is going to be traveling with me! By the end of the year, he'll have one hell of a vacation scrapbook. He'll also pick up some choice gifts along the way. He'll be the most sought after guy at the party. So there!!!

BTW, I walked away with a Leopard Snuggie. Don't go hate''s awesome. My gift, well some would like it, most not. A Susan Boyles CD. Hehe...the chick I stole the Snuggie from got "F-ed" twice by me. So sorry!

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Friday Confessions

I confess that it's Saturday!

I confess that cartoons have been on since 6:55am and it's now 9:50. I have no intention of turning them off!

I confess that I got a funny as shit present for a gift exchange party with friends. I'll only tell AFTER tonight. Baahahahaha!

I confess that I wish the Husb would stay around today, I'm sick and tired of kid duty.

I confess that if the Christmas lights don't get put up this weekend then I'm going out to buy a light up reindeer to put on the front porch. The Husb hates those...well then, put up the lights.

I confess the pork roast I forced the kid to eat last night pretty much sucked.

I confess that I spanked a cat last night for pissing on the kitchen counter. He was caught red handed...or butt in the air. This is the smart cat, so he'll remember. Don't be report'in me to animal'd do it too.

I confess I thought it was the other stupid cat. Sorry I know you only piss in the hallway.

I confess that I acted like I didn't hear the baby last night so I wouldn't have to get up. I do get up most of the time and first every morning though. So there!

I confess that it's almost 10am when the stores open and I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to go shopping ALONE!

Thursday, December 10, 2009


How in the world do people live up North? You know who you are. Your the people that actually wear coats in the car. You have gloves, scarfs and hats. I haven't had a winter hat on since 2003. (I lie...I wear one when I fly out of New York...but not at home!) Today I woke up and it was 22 degrees outside. I live in Texas for a reason...BECAUSE it's not suppose to be 22 freaking degrees! I hate wearing a coat to a store. I walk around and start sweating. Ewww! I like flying to see the snow and coming home. How in the world do people live in Canada or for that matter Alaska? My cousin does live in Alaska. I've had a few layovers there in the summer!! the summer! She has a automatic starter for her car to warm it up. She also said it get so cold all the stray cats don't have the tips of their ears cause they freeze off. That's just wrong. I may have to look into that car starter...sure would be nice to hop into an ice cold car on a 100 degree day. Now that's what I'm talk'in about!

Friday, December 4, 2009

Friday Confessions

I confess:

*I could give a crap about who Tiger is bonking.
*The Husb said I could worry about the Christmas shopping and he'd worry about billing hours to pay for it. Sucker...(I kid...)
*The Husb also just signed a lease for an office. He's been "virtual officing" from the house and his Dad's. I'm virtually done.
*I will be sad when Husbie isn't here so I can leave the baby to pick up T from school.
*I ate shrimp and grits for breakfast.
*I love nap time!
*I've said this before, I'm not nice in the morning til my coffee kicks in.
*I know what my Mother is getting us for Christmas. Score.
*I want a Snuggie.

That's it for today. Unfortunately I hear a baby calling.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

It's 5 o'clock somewhere! I've been enjoying a glass of wine in the evening lately. For some reason I have a rule in my head that I have to wait til 5. I wonder why that is? Perhaps because people get off work at 5? I don't. Not til 8:30 when Mr. T goes to bed. I like wine. It makes me happy. Sure glad I don't have a problem with alcohol. That would really suck.

I've been really bad about blogging lately. Busy with Christmas and the older the baby gets, the more attention he wants. Now he thinks he's missing something if he naps. The only thing he's missing is me shushing Mr. T so he won't wake the baby. Right now he's in his room singing at the top of his lungs. Mr. T...not the baby. ;) Have you ever heard the Spongebob CD? Did you know Spongebob had one? My favorite is "Where's Gary?". Spongebob had lost his pet Snail. Why the hell do I know these things and how is it enriching my life? I know this chick that doesn't let her kid watch TV. He can only watch movies. The poor sap doesn't even know who Spongebob is. He is going to hate school when the kids find out he doesn't have a clue. I never wanted to be that kid.

Hopefully I don't warp my kid too bad. I have a habit of raising my voice. OK, OK, I scream. It's like he has rocks in his ears. I wonder if all boys are like that. Kinda like a man watching sports. "Honey, blah blah blah blah" "I said blah blah blah!!!!" "HELLO!!!!" And I wonder why I like wine. Oh, I also sneeze really loud. LOL, I just scared the kid. Sad, that makes me laugh!

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Good Times!

We got back yesterday from Thanksgiving at the lake. I'll just have to say, this year Thanksgiving rocked. We really had an awesome time. My Sister, Brother-in-law and 3 kids spent two nights out there with us. We played, drank wine, watched movies and raked leaves. OK, I'll be honest...I didn't really rake just made a path so no one would kill themselves coming down the hill to the house. Everyone else except for Sister raked. We did drink wine though. And we're really good at that. The Husb fried two turkeys. Family drove in for the day. It was lots of fun and there was only great food and no arguments. Who knew we could do that? Oh and all the food was properly heated and NO chance of butt explosions. Ya gotta love that!

Now I'm off to take down my fall decorations and bring out those Christmas ones!!!! Did I mention I found the &%^$ stockings!? All is good!

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Happy Thanksgiving!

I love Thanksgiving. It usually makes me laugh. My family is so not uptight or ridged. The damnedest things happen too. When I was in college, we went to my Grandparents in Muskogee Oklahoma for Thanksgiving. They were older so decided to order dinner instead of make everything. The day before we get there about 4pm. After talking to "Mammy & Papa" for a while my Mom asks where the dinner is, because it isn't in the refrigerator. They had picked it up around 10am and it would be reheated on Thanksgiving Day. So my Grandmother says, "It's in the front room." WTH???? She tells us it's fine because it's cool in there. Are you freaking kidding me? They didn't refrigerate it! We rush in and put it in the frig then contemplate what to do. Do we try to get another meal together? Do we risk food poison? Do we tell the rest of the relatives? Let's just say there was a WHOLE lot of praying going on that Thanksgiving. Did ya know that if you accidentally or intentionally leave turkey out for 6 hours, there is good chance it won't kill you or even give you butt explosions? I'm just say'in! :)

Hope your Thanksgiving is everything you want it to be!

Friday, November 20, 2009

40 Things to be thankful for!

1. An awesome Husb! He's sweet, thoughtful and puts up with me and my family!
2. Two great kids! T is smart and funny. Poppy is an awesome baby. Noth'in better than toothless kisses!
3. A great family...challenging at times but giving and full of love.
4. The best friends a girl could have!
5. A cozy comfy house that's warm and welcoming.
6. The Internet!
7. Cable TV
8. Nap time.
9. An awesome Husb...repeat...cause he is! The man is throwing me a fab b-day party!
10. Wine
11. Our family farm in Missouri. It takes me back to really happy times.
12. Cheese grits
13. Pissy and poopy cats...still love them when I want to strangle them.
14. Crawfish
15. Going to the park
16. This should be at the top...a healthy family...we are blessed.
17. My job. Being able to take a year off and go back to flying to Europe. Love it!
18. My new blog friends. I've been neglectful lately. The real family is demanding!
19. T singing songs from his school. He HATES when I sing along!
20. Poppy's laugh. Sounds like the Pillsbury Doughboy!

Not going to 40 cause I gots stuff to do! But I am thankful for the things big and small that make my life what it is. We don't have the biggest house or the nicest cars but those things don't make people happy. Sitting by the chiminea with a fire burning talking about my day with the Husbs, the kiddos tucked into bed. Now that's what it's all about. Peace out! Happy weekend!

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Supah's Sticky Note Tuesday!

Here goes my first Stick it to ya Tuesday! I have a lot to learn! Like how the hell you post a link. Sorry, tired & obviously not the sharpest knife in the drawer!

Monday, November 16, 2009

Quick Life Update!

Busy busy busy!

*Pissy kitty has Diabetes and requires 2 shots a day...$100 every three months. Crap
*Four kid Birthday parties in two days sucks. NO MORE CAKE!
*T's real Birthday tomorrow. More cake?
*5pm Birthday dinner on Thursday with the Husb's people. Two reasons it's so freaking early.
First, baby gets bitchy when he's tired and I like to watch Survivor and Grey's Anatomy on
Thursday. The Husbs idea to do it early. That's why I love him.
*My Birthday Friday...40...ewwwww.
*My wine tasting Birthday party Saturday. Telling Mr. T it's "Going to Aunties" so he doesn't
get his feelings hurt...cause he ain't invited.


Thursday, November 12, 2009

I'm Guilty...

If you've been reading this blog a while, you already know that I have two pissy and shitty cats. I've said bad things about them and wished death upon them. OK, maybe not so much wished death upon them. Not out loud anyway. Anyhow, I was thinking that we probably had another 5-8 years to deal with their bad behavior. They are stray cats which for some reason seem to live forever. Well, to get to the point, I have noticed in the last few weeks that one of the cats has gotten really skinny. He's been eating, but also drinking a bunch of water. I feel like shit because instead of being a good pet parent and taking him to the vet, I just hoped he'd get better. Out of the two cats he's the one that loves me. He's actually pretty sweet if you don't pet him and let him do the loving. He seems to like the kids and when in a good mood he even lets the baby pet him.

I'm a big chicken and didn't want to be the one to take him to the vet. I mean what if something horrible happened. Like they pointed out we hadn't taken him there in 10 years, or that we should of seen the signs, or that they were going to have to put him to sleep. What would I do then? I'm sure have a total melt down and embarrass myself. Lovely. So glad the Husb is awesome and saved me from humiliating myself.

I know that I am so powerful that my wish of death would come true. (wink, wink) So I'm saying it out loud and writing it down. I take it back, I'm sorry. I'll deal with the pee and be nicer and gentler about it. Come to find out Emerson may have Diabetes. If we caught it early we may be able to control it with diet. If not we'll give him daily insulin shots. $100 every three months. WTH? Repeat to self...I love Emerson. He is nice to the kids. The baby loves him. He will stop peeing if he feels better. He is worth it. Repeat...repeat.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009


Have I mentioned that I'm turning 40 in 9 days. Sorry if your 40 plus, but I'm not looking forward to it. My Husb and Sister are throwing a wine tasting birthday party which should ease the pain...kinda. BLAH BLAH BLAH. That's all I got.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Party Time!

I know I've been talking about it a bunch, but tough. So, Mr. T's 5th birthday party is this Saturday. Taking the advice of my Sister who has three kids, I searched around to find a place to have his party. I would rather eat a spoonful of dirt then have it at home. I found a gymnastics place that had a 40% off special on Birthday parties. No, Mr. T is not into gymnastics...but ya gotta love a sale and he likes to jump around and stuff. I booked the gymnastics place and ordered the $41 Spongebob cake. I'm SUCH a sucker. The grocery store has one all done up and every time we go in T gets all hyper and happy pointing to the $41 cake. So, I ordered one. Sucker, sucker, sucker.

Now I've been on the hunt for party favors. Can I just say I would like to beat the ass of the"over achiever", "Martha Stewart", "my kids party has to be the best" mother for inventing party favors. WHY WHY WHY? I have already spent plenty on entertainment, not to mention $41 on an awesome Spongebob cake. WHY do I need to get party favors? Because, if I don't, my kid will be the uncool one because of no party favor. Don't even get me started on the damn RSVP's. That's a whole other post entirely!

Monday, November 9, 2009

Toys toys toys!

This coming Saturday is T's 5th birthday party. The second that is over we are running to another friends party. We will then recover from all that cake and go to two more parties (that over lap time wise) on Sunday. Needless to say, I had to go to Toys R Us to buy gifts. Can I just say that there are a shit load of toys out there!!! Seriously...I mean...SERIOUSLY! I'm happy to say that I had a game plan before going. The only kid I wasn't sure about was my own. I zipped in with my shopping buddy Poppy. So glad he doesn't ask for stuff. I found the toys I was hunting for and then became stumped on what to get T. Ya see, he likes anything boy. Dinosaurs, race cars, Batman, rockets, Nerf guns, you get the picture. The entire time I'm adding up what I have to make sure I hit $75 to get my $10 gift card. I love those coupons. Harharhar...silly me. Like it's going to be a problem spending $75. I decided not to buy T a ton of stuff. He'll get plenty from his party and our family. He ended up with Operation Spongebob and an Ant's in Spongebob's Pants game. (It was free with the Operation game and will be saved til Christmas. I love free shit.) I already bought an awesome light up Solar System that goes on the ceiling. I figure it's educational...right? Of course I had to add a few little things for Poppy since he didn't gripe and whine. Got him some pants on sale, a few teething toys, diapers and a bib. Wondering if I made it to $75? Yeah and them some. $124 and some change. Lord help me when Christmas shopping starts. Speaking of, I found my Christmas Stockings! WOOOOOHOOOOOO! They were behind a craft basket in a closet I'd already looked in. Hummmm. Now I just need to have one made for the baby. That's T with the elusive stockings. I love those stocking. The Husb hates them. Not traditional and you can't get much in them. I say they only need to be big enough for jewelry, perfume and chocolate. But what do I know?

Sunday, November 8, 2009

My Odd Thoughts!

Too bad you can't spank a fish. We have four Silver Dollar fish. One is an asshole. He chases the other ones around. I'd like to spank his fishy butt.

I really like that nose sucker thing they sent home from home the hospital when I had Poppy. I have become really proficient at sucking snot. I feel such a sense of accomplishment when a get a huge bugger.

Did you know that the Squirrel on Spongebob is from Texas? Did you even know there was a squirrel on Spongebob? By the way, her name is Sandy.

I still can't find my Christmas stockings. OK, I haven't looked anymore, but I will.

I don't love Antique Stores. Went to one yesterday. They are smelly and have a bunch of that stuff I could of had when we cleaned out my Grandparents house. I also didn't know that some people collect owls. One stall was all owls. I didn't know I had an aversion to owls. I do.

I'm bitchy when I am woken up everyday before 7a.m. I repeat BITCHY.

I caught my pissy cat actually peeing in his box. I wonder what's wrong with him.

That's all I have for this lovely Sunday. I'm headed to my sister's to drop off the kid for a bit and then we are taking the baby to a craft show.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Yeah 5!

Little did I know that not being able to get pregnant for so long would actually be a blessing. It took probably 2 1/2 years to get pregnant with Poppy. Some gland in my head...Pituitary gland?...thought I was already pregnant. Just a few pills and a couple of shots and I was lucky enough to have number 2 on the way. I've been noticing some of my friends that have two kids. None of them are as far apart as T and Poppy. Their kids range for 18months to 2 1/2 years apart. I often feel overwhelmed and rushed and annoyed. They must feel it 3x more than I do. It must suck to be them. One friend had twins when her son was only 18 months old. She calls the first 3 years "The Dark Years". Lovely huh?

T will be 5 next week. He has grown so much, I can't believe he was once a little guy like Poppy. I know I take for granted all the things he can do on his own. I lay out his clothes and he dresses himself. OK, I'll be honest, most of the time I have to tell him 5 times to do it and sometimes threaten harm. 99% of the time his underwear is even on the right way. He goes and gets me things when I ask, fetches the remote control when I'm too lazy to get up and jumps around to make the baby stop crying. It's frustrating when thing don't go like you'd planned. I wanted my kids to be closer in age. Now I'm thanking my lucky stars that they aren't. I was waiting in a doctors office one day and a lady asked how far apart my kids were. I told her 4 1/2 years. She said I had planned perfectly...when one gets out of college, the other one will be going in. Let's just hope T doesn't do what Mommy did and go on the 5 year plan. Yeah 5!

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Thrilled Thursday!

Hummm.... I'm so much better at bitching then being thrilled. Here goes!

Tonight I get to have wine and left over Halloween candy while sitting around my neighbors fire pit. No boys and no kids. Whoop!

My baby is napping.

Mr. T doesn't get out of school til 2 and he should be in a great mood cause today he has art class.

Facebook makes me happy I'm me and have my life.

My hair looks a little better today. (Hey, I'm trying people!)

I'm almost alone. ( is here.)

When Poppy (baby, not his real name) wakes up we're going shopping. Even if it's only for groceries. He doesn't know how to ask for shit.

The Husb filled my gas tank yesterday.

The front of my house looks fab with all it's "Fallness"!

It's not hot here. (Texas)

Ok I suck at this happy shit. No more Thrilled Thursdays! I'm much better at Whiny Check SpellingWednesday.

Peace out!

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Whiney Wednesday!

OK, it's not the kid, it's me. Here goes!

I have never been a napper. Now that I have two kids, I'd like to take a nap. Why doesn't an almost 5 year old take a nap? Isn't he tired after all that running around?

Eating three mini Mounds candy bars makes me feel ucky.

Why can't I figure out that bulb sucker thing to suck out the baby's snot? My Sister is really good at it.

If my cat pees one more time in the hallway, I'm going to glue his buttocks closed.

My hair looks like shit everyday.

I'm going to be 40 in 16 days and am none too happy about it.

Why do fast food places advertise a certain kids toy and then give you some other shitty toy? I took the kid to Burger King today for a Spongebob toy that comes in the kids meal. I haven't been to Burger King in 3 maybe 4 years. He ended up with some shitty Simpson's toy. He doesn't even know who the Simpson's are. Same thing happened a few weeks ago with Sonic. Take the damn sign down already.

Why are there so many freaking bills? All those envelopes are annoying. (Yeah...I know, do the online crap...we do, sorta.)

Why does one cat poop right outside his box? Doesn't matter if it's clean or not.

If T asks one more time, "Will you buy me that" when watching TV, I just may freak out.

I didn't get any pictures of the baby in his frog costume. Now I gotta get off my butt and dress him up again.

Thanks for letting me rant. Oh wait, it's my blog and I can do what I want. Yeah me.

Tomorrow shall be Thrilled Thursday!

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Halloweenie Pictures!

Just a few pics to get up your ghoul!

The brain was made out of small watermelon! My friend made the spider and puking pumpkin. And the vampires...well, what can I say? Mr. T also loved the radish eyeballs!

Monday, November 2, 2009

Fall Back!

I love Fall. I've decided it's my favorite season. Well, until Spring hits...then Spring is my almost favorite. It all starts in October when I can break out my Halloween decorations and gain an hour of sleep!! BTW, the party was awesome! The second Halloween is over I take down the decorations so fast your head would spin around. I then move on to my Fall decorations. Not many of these...just left over pumpkins and flowers from Halloween. Of course I add my Fall flag and this ugly ass scarecrow my Mom gave T. And then when November rolls around the real fun begins! Love Thanksgiving! It was the one holiday that we didn't have to travel to relatives. Sometimes we did go to Muskogee Oklahoma or Jane Missouri to see Grandparents, but it wasn't a given.

Christmas has always been a big favorite too. We ALWAYS spent Christmas at my Grandparents in Muskogee and then drove up or were picked up by the other Grandparents (and Dad after the parents divorced) to go to Jane. When I started flying I couldn't get Christmas off to save my life. My first Christmas off was due to a head cold. I went to the Doctor and he said I could actually fly December 24th...but when he found out I had a trip, he wrote me a note to stay out. I could of kissed that man! It was the first time in my life I had woken up at home and celebrated Christmas. I think the Husb and I were only married a few years. Since then I've gotten lucky. If not having it off then getting home early. As the years go on, the more senior I am, I say hell no...I ain't flying Christmas! Of course this year I'm on a leave, so no worries! Now here comes a dilemma. The year before last I bought these awesome stockings on line. Last year when I found out I was pregnant, I went looking for another one. Crap, they don't sell them anymore. Just a weird version that has leopard print on it. Not for my boy! I decided after Christmas to take the stockings and put them in a convenient place so I could either have one made or find a matching one. Well, guess what? I can't remember where the hell that convenient place is. Shit, I can't find our damn stockings. I've searched everywhere. So, now I'm off to search every nook and cranny in this little house...again. Wish me luck!

Friday, October 30, 2009

Help it's Halloween!

I haven't posted because Halloween is kicking my ass and it hasn't even happened yet. My Step-Mother has been in town too. I've tried to be attentive so she doesn't go home thinking we didn't give a poo that she was here. Hard to do when your tired. Tonight I get to go to dinner...glad it will involve seafood and beer, and then we're going to a high school football game. My Niece plays in the band and I feel like a crappy Aunt because I didn't go to a single game last year or this year. I was pregnant and tired last year and now I'm just tired. My excuse and I'm sticking to it. I really do want to see her play, but I'd just as soon poke a stick in my eye than watch the game.

Now back to my needing help. We're having a "small" kids Halloween party tomorrow night and the guest list keeps getting bigger. Shit! Some weren't coming and now are, some we're maybe's that are now yes's. Invite them and they will come. Thank God the weather is suppose to be nice. Since most of these folks have kids it will be an early night. (I hope, like I said, I'm tired.) We're looking at about 30 people. That's really not that big but for some reason I do a mental freak out every year when the list gets big. My Husb so nicely reminded me of this. Halloween being on Saturday is a bonus...I'll get more help. Ok, I'm over my freak out. Promise to take lots of pictures. Cause I'm doing it right! Gotta go carve a watermelon into a brain now. Happy Halloween!

Monday, October 26, 2009

Toilet Humor!

I have a dirty little secret. We have a baby blue toilet in the master bathroom. I use the term master bathroom loosely because it's a little bigger than a closet. Ya see, not everything is bigger in Texas. We live in a three bedroom house built in the early 1960's. We bought it from a friend of my Mom's 11 years ago right after we got married. We planned to live here no more than 5 years. Well, we passed that by 6 years. The thing is, we didn't pay much so our mortgage is awesome. The house is in a suburb just about 2 miles north of Dallas. Great location, no alley, nice yard and safe neighborhood. I'd also like think we're being green by not living in a huge obnoxious house. (Even though I'd add a second floor and pool in a second if I had the jack!) So we're stay'in. We remodeled the living room by knocking out the dining room wall and also updated the kitchen. We haven't touched the back of the house, hence the beau-T-ful blue bathroom.

Last night I get a call from a friend that has been out of town taking care of family stuff. Her husband's 97 year old grandmother has a house that has been shut up for 4 years while the Grandmother has been in a nursing home. My friend has been sending me pictures of stuff they have found in the house. The electricity was off for four years...small water leaks, you kinda get the idea. One picture she sent was of a Jim Beam bottle in the shape of a cat. I looked on dates 1967. Wow! Anyhow, she says she has something for me from Grandma's house. Needless to say, I'm worried and kinda scared. What in the hell could it be? My friend and her husband show up on our doorstep....with a brand new toilet. White...never been out of the box! I can't believe I'm so EXCITED about a toilet! But I am!!!! I'm so happy they thought of me when they saw that toilet! It really is the gift that keeps on giving!

Sunday, October 25, 2009

What ya think?

OK, so as you can see, I've been experimenting. I'm kinda sucky at computer stuff so I'm proud that I actually was able to get a different background for my blog. I wanted something a little funky but not too much. I find that sometime blogs are really distracting and hard to read cause of all the shit on them. I don't want to be like that. I also figured out how to enlarge the font size. Duh...that was easy. I guess I don't usually have time to sit around and mess with this kind of stuff. Someone always wants something from me. Waaa waaaa waaaa....I'm hungry, I'm thirsty, I don't want to watch I Carly. You get it. Anyway, how does it look? Do you hate it? Any suggestions for better sites for blog layouts. Some of ya'll have awesome looking blogs and I want to be just like you! Well...after reading some blogs...maybe not exactly! Hardy har har!

Friday, October 23, 2009

11 years!

Eleven years ago tomorrow I married the Husb. We got married in the evening so we could have a rock'in reception. With financing from my Mother, I'd like to think we did a pretty good job! We had an awesome Blues Band that brought down the house! The funny thing is, recently I have seen some news stories about the lead singer. The dude was old then or so I thought. I just assumed he wasn't around anymore. Ok, I assumed he was dead. I guess he isn't that old. The news stories talked about how a bunch of kids kept showing up to his gigs. The thing is...his name is Joe Jonas. Yeah, not that Joe Jonas. In my opinion, he is much better than that one. I thought that was kinda funny. Kids are so freaking stupid. Yeah, Joe Jonas and his brothers are playing at the small Blues bar Memphis in a strip mall. Righttttt!

Today a van pulls up in front of the house and the Husb acts like he doesn't know who it is. A florist brought an beautiful floral arrangement to the door. What a sweet Husb. He is so getting some tonight. This week he's been calling it our anniversary week. He got that from a friend of ours. Each year she has her "birthday week". The Husb said he didn't know why I couldn't have an "Anniversary Week". I so agree! Hehe! He's really making some of my friends husbands look bad. Tomorrow we're going out to the Fondue place where we had our first date. It should be fun and I promise not to "almost" get kicked out like I did that time. Did ya know it's never a good idea to throw ice in boiling oil? Happy Anniversary Husb! I think I'll keep you!

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Play with me!

Dirty minded people! I know what your thinking...ewww. Today my baby (5 year old!) is having his first "alone" play date. His buddy's Mom asked last week if she could take him home from Preschool to play with her son. Sure! Sounds great. I just can't figure out why I'm a little concerned. Should I have asked the question about guns in the house...and are they locked away? Do I want to come off as some paranoid helicopter parent that can't let their kid take a poop without knowing about it? I'm new to this take a kid home thing. This Mom has an older kid so she's already got it all figured out. Me, not so much. I'm going to be brutally honest here...brutally. I don't want to take anyones kid home. Ever. A lot of the time I don't want to take mine home...why add to it? I get it, kids need interaction to get along with others. Isn't that why I'm paying $380 bucks a month for preschool? Now I'm here wondering if T is freaking out because essentially some strange woman is taking him some place he's only been to once. OR is he like, "Mom who"? He's not exactly what I'd call a Mama's boy. Ok, not at all. I'm working on the little one being Mama's boy. I want to be kinda like those Mama's on the show "Mama's Boys". It was a horrible reality show and no, I don't want to be totally like that. These Mama's were beyond control freaks. I just want my boys to realize that when I tell them their girlfriend is a scank hoe, I know what I'm talking about. Glad I only have two boys to worry about instead of all the boys. Yes...still worried til he gets home.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009


I've always felt that the second child gets jipped. Perhaps because I'm a second child? Yes, sometimes parents are so damn tired after the first, that the second kid may have gotten away with a lot more too. I prefer to think I was better behaved and therefore earned more. Now that I have a second...I realize the parents were just done. When I was pregnant with T, I had the book that told me what was supposedly happening everyday. The Husb would come home and I'd greet him with, "I developed the baby's lungs today, what did you do?" I religiously read the book so I'd know exactly what to expect. The second pregnancy finally comes along...I filled in the dates above T's, no use wasting $ on a new book. I think I looked at it twice. Jipped. I filled out each section of T's baby book every week. I've had to guesstimate almost everything with Poppy's book. Jipped. I took pictures on every occasion with T. Now I'm lucky if I remember to bring out the camera. Jipped.

Tonight I'm feeding the baby and wondering how the hell to figure out how much to feed him. I have no idea. When T started eating, I was so excited, I looked up everything. I knew how many bottles a day he drank, how much he should be eating, what he should be eating. Now? Not so much. I decided to feed Poppy about what I thought the size of his stomach could hold. We don't want any puking ya know. I don't know if baby's are like feral cats or what. I know a lot about cats. Some cats like that eat til they puke. He could of eaten more...but like I puking. So, if he wanted more? Jipped.

Monday, October 19, 2009

Happy Birthday to me...

OK, it's not my birthday til November 20th! My friend D, Sister and I went on Saturday to this craft/swap meet kinda place called McKinney Trade Days. They have a few vendors that sale wrought iron. Did ya know I totally dig anything metal? Well, that and I have a bit of a stained glass addiction. Just ran out of windows for it. I have all kinds of awesome wrought iron! A windmill looking thing the Husb hates. I have metal pumpkins, a metal cornucopia, a metal Christmas tree, two metal cats, I even have a metal mosquito. You get the idea. So, we're cruising around the Trade Days and come across the vendor with all the wrought iron stuff. Ohhh...Ahhhh! I need more wrought iron like I need a hole in my head. The Husb would kill me. But not Sister! They had two awesome Peacocks for sale. Yep...I don't have a Peacock! She decided she had to have one. Of course, I didn't just fall off the turnip truck...I have no business buying a $49 Peacock. Sister knew I was eyeball'in it and guess what? I got me an early birthday present!!! Isn't he cute?! Now he just needs a name!

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Oh to be young...

Let me start by saying to my Niece, I'm not ragging, just reporting! When I was young and unfamiliar the same thing could of happened...well maybe. My Niece that just moved to Austin decided to come to Dallas this weekend. Three other friends came with her including a guy she met while traveling in Europe. This chick has guts...traveled Europe basically alone for almost 3 months. Occasionally a friend or family member popped in during her journey. Not something I would think of doing alone. Anyhow, Niece and friends come to Dallas. Before they leave she e-mails with a few questions. First, where's a good place to go dancing? Haha...she's asking people with two kids and 40. (I'm not 40 but really really close). Can't tell you the last time I went dancing at a club. Second, where to watch the Texas/OU game. Easy...Victory Park. It has huge screens outside and is suppose to be cool. No, I've never actually watched anything thing there. I have been to a Stars Hockey game and Mavs Basketball game at the Arena though. Third, a good Mexican restaurant. Easy breezing...I'm really good at food! The Husb ask where they are staying. She doesn't know yet.

This is where it gets interesting. Remember when you were young, just starting out in life and didn't have a pot to piss in? Well, that's where she is. She has found that getting a job in Austin isn't as easy as once thought. Austin's a bitch. Awesome fun town. Great music and food. Beautiful and right on the edge of Texas hill country. There lies the problem. Nobody wants to leave. A friend of mine told me his wife would make $20,000-$30,000 more a year at her job as a Physical Therapist if they moved to San Antonio. Needless to say the job market is tight and she isn't making a ton of money.

Niece calls yesterday and tells the Husb where she has booked a room thru Priceline. The motel is in South Dallas close to Fair Park. Ever been to Dallas? You DO NOT want to be in that area of town, especially at night. I wouldn't be surprised if they rent the rooms by the hour. Picture hookers, homeless and Meth. Enough said. Priceline reviews were ok she said and it was the cheapest she could find. We read reviews that were more along the lines of, "This is the scariest place I've ever stayed", "I wore flip flops in the shower because I didn't want to get a disease", oh and my favorite, "The dirty toilet seat wasn't attached and there was a dead lizard in the toilet." Ewwwww.... Her parents would be pissed if they knew we let her stay there. Regardless if there were a couple of guys with her or not. We convinced her to try and cancel even if she couldn't get a refund. The Husb got her a room at Motel 6 in Addison...a much much nicer part of town. Thank God. Just between you and I Motel 6 makes me go ewwww...but I am spoiled with really nice places that Delta usually puts us up in. The Double Tree is roughing it for me. Glad the Husb and I were on the same page. It was so worth the $ not lose sleep over it...or to get a phone call that her car had been stripped. Oh to be young and....

Friday, October 16, 2009

When Insects Fly!

Last night started off pretty good and went down hill from there. We went to dinner with a bunch of family friends that are in Dallas for Texas/OU weekend. We do it every year. Apparently Poppy hates Pappadeaux and going out at bedtime. My angel baby turned into whiny baby. Mr T...not much better by the end of the night. We get home and all I wanted to do is watch my DVR'ed Grey's Anatomy. We put the kids to bed and sat down for an awesome show. Twenty minutes into it, a VERY large insect flies from the fireplace to the front door, changes it's insect mind and flies back to land on top of TV cabinet. I ask the Husb what the hell it was...a hummingbird? He gets up with a magazine in hand. It's a HUGE roach. (Also known as a water bug). But wait, roaches don't fly you say. Yeah, me too. I don't know if this was some freak mutant roach or an over achiever roach or what. The thing flew like a bird.

I love the Husb. He is really good at a lot of things. He sucks at killing roaches. He always misses. Rolled up magazines don't work. Crocs work. The Husb goes after the roach and guess what? He misses. Not such a big deal if it's not a mutant roach. This roach however launches itself off the TV cabinet and flies directly at my head. I jump off the couch all the while screaming curse words at the top of my lungs. The damn thing lands on the back of the couch and crawls down inside the couch. Excuse my language...fuck! I retrieve a Croc from the bedroom and start helping take all the cushions off the couch. After moving it around and lifting the couch the bastard crawls out and runs under the coffee table. He's trapped. Well guess what? Now we can't find him and I'm pissed. All I wanted to do was chill and watch Grey's. Now I'm on my hands and knees carefully taking all the books and shit off the shelf under the table. God forbid the damn thing fly out at me. After 10 minutes of looking, we give up. I'm pissed off big time. I watch the rest of Grey's while keeping an eye out for flying roaches.

Fast forward 1:20am. Baby is up. I get the bottle, the Husb feeds him. I go to the bathroom on the way back to bed. The bastard roach comes running into the bathroom. My Croc isn't handy so I grab a can of hairspray and blast him. He runs out down the hall. I whack him with the can and run to find my Croc. After 3 wacks the bastard is finally dead. Oh the sweet victory I feel. I do a happy dance in hallway and go to tell the Husb I've killed that Fucker. Dead dead dead! His response? "Umm...ok". Hello??? Just killed Mutant Cockroach! It was great. No matter what one might say about Crocs, Croc flip flops rock!

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Out of the Mouth of Babes!

I've often thought that young kids should be able to understand baby talk because they were so recently baby themselves. Why can't T tell me what Poppy wants or is saying? When I ask him, he just looks at me like I'm crazy and says, "I don't speak baby".

What do you think babies would say if someone could understand their language? I think Poppy says:

*Don't push my legs like that, your going to make me fart.

*Help, I've fallen and I can't get up.

*HELLLLLOOOO...over here please!

*Why does this food taste so bland?

*Awwww man, I peed myself again!

*Put me to bed already!

*Could you please go brush your teeth? Your breath is killing me.

*Please please stop patting my ass!

What do you think baby's would say?

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Let's Be Fair!

Today we went to the Texas State Fair. There is nothing like it! Ok, there probably is but I'm trying to make it seem big and grand. Kinda like Texas it's self. Yes, I'm from Texas. It's not just a's a state of mind! Hehe! At the Fair, fried food is where it's at. We had a corny dog, but passed on the fried peanut butter sandwich, fried oreos, fried snickers, fried Twinkies and fried pizza. Yes, I said, fried pizza. Just plain sick. We did partake in the new Fried Butter. Sounds sick too. Not too bad really! Kinda tasted like a donut with oozy warm butter inside. Weird! I wonder if all State Fairs are into this fried shit.

Mr. T was totally digging all the rip off games. We spend $20 and he won a blow up Spongebob, a tiny dalmatian dog, a medium dolphin and a medium teddy bear. He loved it. He also rode some of the rides. The bumper cars were pretty funny. It was just him and another kid. They would spin around and around a circles. The worker would turn them around to face each other and they'd haul ass. At the last second before impact one would spin away, NEVER bumping into each other. The other kids Mom and I had a good laugh. T begged to go on this really tall slide. The kind where you get in a bag and slide down. The Husb went with him in case he got cold feet. Husb said it was a hell of climb. He kept looking back and shaking his head at me. I'm not stupid...I went thru the easy Fun House. They finally get to the top and T jumps in his bag, screams "Bye Dad" and is off like a shot. No fear. I'm really afraid of the teenage years!

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Here Bassy Bassy Bass!

This weekend the Fam and I went to the lake. Our Niece that just moved to Austin met us out there. Just so you don't think we're some well to do snotty lake house owning family..let me explain. As some of you know, about 5 years ago a friend came to our group of friends because he couldn't afford to keep his lake house. After much discussion, a fee arrangement and a legal agreement, we came up with The Cedar Creek Raft and Tube Society. Or in short The RATS. Cute huh? Anyhow, basically each of the RATS has a full private week at the lake every 7 weeks. The owner has twice as many, and we have open play for holiday weeks...meaning everyone can come out and frolic. (That word makes me laugh!)

Saturday morning while lounging in bed, I could of sworn I heard the National Anthem. I get up and sure enough that what it is. Apparently this weekend was a National Champion Bass Tournament. WOW...LOT O' BOATs out there. Later, I tell the Husb and he's like, "Cool" and I'm like, "No really, there were a shit load of boats out there!" Sunday morning, I'm feeding the baby on the couch about 6am and in the distance can see lights on the public boat ramp. Lots and lots of boat trailers going up the hill. I go back to bed and wake up about 7am. I glanced out the window and damn...looked like the lights in down town Dallas. The Husb and I get up...and there are over 300 bass boats in our little part of the lake. How do I know there were more than 300 you ask? No, I did not count them. The announcer dude starts sending them out one by one. By the time the Husb starts listen to the numbers the guy is on 274 counting down. (I was inside getting coffee when they started. I know what's important, coffee makes me nice.) So off they went to find the biggest baddest bass around. Awesome site seeing all those fisherman standing in their boats at 7:15am, hands over their hearts in honor of the USA. Ain't America great?

Thursday, October 8, 2009

It's Official!

It's official...I've lost my damn mind! A little background, today I went to lunch at a friends...we call our selves "Ladies who Lunch..and Gentleman". I'm a flight attendant on leave, but when I'm working...I don't fly that much and have lots of days off. A few years ago my good friend K and I started having lunch during the week when she was off of work. She did job share and had the first half of the week off. Last year K was laid off so we really started lunching more. Another friend moved to town and decided to stay home with her kids, so she joined us. We've also added another occasional drop in that was laid off and a guy friend that was laid off several months ago. Hey, we're equal opportunity lunchers. We do all this when the kids are in school, because lets face it, kids are not conducive to good conversation. It's always, "Oh have you tried that new little Bistro on Main St.? STOP RUBBING THAT ROLL ON THE WALL!"

Now to the "I've officially lost my mind" part. Today on the way up to K's I get to calculating the exact minute I have to leave to pick up T from preschool. I decide if I leave 25 minutes til 3 I'll have plenty of time not to be charged a late pick up fee. A buck a's a racket I tell you! Now this all sounds good in theory, but guess what? T gets out of school at 2:00 not 3:00. He has NEVER gotten out at 3:00. WTH is wrong with me? I don't figure it out til 1:46 when I look down at my phone. Holy Shit it's almost 2PM!!!! I grab the baby, run for the door like I'm possessed all the while screaming thanks and sorry I've lost my damn mind. It's official.

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Amuse me...

OK, I'll admit it, I'm very easily amused. Today for a mere $16.38 I purchased a tomb stone and skeleton parts from Walgreens. The Husb suggested we use the rock in the flower bed to make it look like the dude was crushed to death. I LOVE IT! It makes me so happy...I know I must be weird. Now if I can just find a gigantic spider to climb up the chimney, I'll be set. Halloween is so fun!

Monday, October 5, 2009


Things I like...

Baby & kid butts. They are too freaking cute! Poppy has started sleeping on his stomach with his butt in the air. I almost can't control myself...I want to grab that booty. T, well his little naked butt begs to be pinched. A friend and I were talking yesterday. She loves kiddy butts too, and wondered when it becomes inappropriate to pinch them. Think T & Poppy will mind when they're 16? Hehe!

The Husb being home. Ya don't realize how much you miss them til they go away for a few days.

Decorating for Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas. I love the fall! Summers here in Texas are just a bit too long, so when the cooler weather breaks thru and football season starts, life is good!

Mr. T singing to Rock music. He has started to become a bit of a sexist. He's almost 5 and a sexist. It's true. The boy wants to listen to Rock that guys sing, not girls. If a woman happens to be singing also, he'll tell me that part is mine to sing along too.

Reality TV. I love The Amazing Race and Survivor. Never want to be on either one. I don't love camping and I would be the raving bitch on The Amazing Race.

Things that bug me...

T waking me up early. The last two mornings at 6am...but then got to "sleep in" til 7am. I like to wake up on my own. I'm not friendly before my first cup of coffee.

Drawers that are over stuffed. It's my fault, I know. But dang...I sure am good a shoving the kids clothes in. A bunch of Poppy's clothes don't fit cause they were T's and a November baby and April baby don't match up on sizes. Guess I'll have to get off my butt and clear some out.

Washing out all the left over containers that are in the frig. Bugs me.

Pokeyman cards all over the floor of my room. Pick them up already!!!!

Things I wonder about...

Why do some people have all kinds of shit on the dashboard of their cars? I once heard a story of someone getting in a minor wreak and they were killed because a box of Kleenex impaled them in the head. It was sitting in the back window of their car. Do you think that's really true?

Where my cute spider candle holder and glittery skull is. Have I missed a box of Halloween decorations? It it in the scary garage?

Why do I have a baby that has blond hair? No one in either Husbs family or mine (besides nieces and nephew who got it from their Dad) have blond hair. The Husb had blond hair til he was about 4. Where did he get it???

Ok, those are my musings for the day!

Friday, October 2, 2009

I'm sick....

I'm a sick sick Mommy! Why do I find it bend over, grab your sides, laugh out loud funny that Mr. T is scared to death of those human size Mummy's and Monster's they sale at Garden Ridge and Michael's? I'm snickering just thinking about it. He is freaking hilarious! I'm so sick. Today we were at Garden Ridge going down the Halloween aisle. T loves skulls and most skeletons. I say most skeletons because he doesn't like the ones that have blood and ragged clothes. Freaks him out enough for him to say, "OK, OK, OK...let's go over there...let's not look at those...come on, come on!" That's cute, but dang, when you round a corner and he sees one of those Mummy''s enough to make ya pee on yourself. Poor guy.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Fun & Games!

I've had my fun and games, so now it's the Husb's time. Tomorrow he is headed out to go hunting. Funny thing is...he doesn't hunt. Those poor dove don't know what their in for. Darn things will be deaf for weeks. The Husb doesn't hunt mainly because a tragic hunting accident he witnessed as a kid. He's not warped or anything...but the story sorta warped me, so I won't go into it. Let's just say I'm opposed to my kids going hunting.

When I go on my merry way, I take wine and wasbi almonds. The Husb and friends...take "supplies". Tonight Husbs friend is coming for dinner and then they are going to shop...for supplies. Hehe. I talked to another friend today about the trip. Her husband left it 6:30 am this morning and apparently was a shopping fool last night. All I ask is that they are careful, don't hunt while drunk and please, please don't bring any bloody birds home. I've heard dove is gamey. I think I've tried it once, but it was wrapped in bacon. I truly believe I could eat a turd if it was wrapped in enough I don't recall if the dove was gamey.

Now I wonder what in the world are the kids and I going to do all weekend alone. I'm hoping there is a bunch of cash in the bank account. I then have a plan. I say, order pizza and Chinese, go to Home Depot and get a bunch of fall flowers to plant and continue decorating the crap outta the house for Halloween. Love Halloween, and yes, I've already decorated. Can you really have enough scary stuff? I don't really have a lot of scary stuff...but I'd like too. Humm...maybe this weekend. While the cats away, the mice will play.

Monday, September 21, 2009

It's getting hot in here...

So take off all your clothes!!!! That song keeps running thru my head cause I'm hot as hell. I've been cleaning cleaning cleaning! Got home yesterday from Destin. I'd been forewarned by my Sister (the cat sitter) that my little pissers were doing their job like expected. For those who haven't read earlier posts, I have two pissy (and poopy) cats. They get especially bad when we're gone. Sister kept the poop picked up and did her best to wipe up the pee, but the smell still lingers. Tonight we're having friends over for dinner. We're meeting the guys fiancee from Germany and I don't want her think we're nasty Americans that let their cats urinate everywhere. Even though, I guess we do. But can you really keep a cat from peeing? Besides sewing his butt up or locking him in a cage?

My Mother likes to harass my Sister because years ago she was taking care of our 18 year old cat while I was at college and Mom was outta town. She walks in and finds the cat dead. Hey, the cat was 18!!! The funny part or you might think sick part is the message she left on my answering machine. "Hey Niki, just wanted you to know I found Pepper dead in Mother's hallway". If that wasn't a bad enough message about a beloved pet, she added, "Oh...she must of been dead for a while cause she was hard". WTH? A few weeks ago, once again Sister is looking after Mother's cats. She walks in and finds one that won't lift her head and is lethargic. She calls me frantic because she knows Mom will freak out and mention it for the rest of her life if the cat dies. Sister takes the cat to the vet, it gets an I.V. drip and all is well. Nothing wrong with the cat...just a little depressed. Weird damn cat! Now my Mom "jokes" about sister being the cat killer. Now I "joke" if she kills my cats that we'll throw her a big party. I'm joking...I think.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Vacation from a vacation

Is a vacation REALLY a vacation if your traveling with kids? I think not. Everything seems just a little be harder. Ok, let's be frank, a whole hell of lot harder. We made it to Destin without any major problems. Stopped in a tiny little town for pie. Yes, pie. A client of the Husb suggested we make the stop. There's a market it Luxey Alabama...I think that's the name and they sell awesome pies. We had lunch there which was quaint, but sucked. But the pies! Damn good pies. We only bought one and would like to stop on the way back but probably won't because of a change of travel plans. As I said before, vacationing with kids really isn't a true vacation. We have decided to suck it up and leave a day early and spend the night somewhere along the way. No since in making a 12-14 hours trip in one day. I say 12-14 hours cause...did I mention we are traveling with kids?

So we get to Destin Monday afternoon. I have been forewarned that the Husb will have to do some work while we're here. I can deal with that. Tuesday morning it rains a bit. Once that let's up, I decide that we'll go out to the beach. Just the 2 1/2 of us. Me, T and Poppy. What a beating. The entire time out there I have to watch T like a hawk so he doesn't get dragged into the deep blue yonder by the under tow. So not relaxing. And this is after hauling down an umbrella, two beach chairs, two boogie boards, a bouncy seat, three towels and a bag of crap. Today I was notified that the Husb was once again going to be working a few hours. Of course the guilt of Motherhood once again takes over. Yes, we are right on the beach. The sun has broken thru the clouds. Am I really going to let the kid watch The Incredibles one more time while I read the Twilight books? Guilt guilt guilt. I once again drag all that shit down to the beach, get set up, stick the kid in a life jacket and settle down to watch him like a hawk while now and then screaming for him to get the hell out of the water. The boy can't seem to understand..."Don't go any further than your shins." All the while pointing to his shins!!!!! 3o minutes into it, the baby is napping next to me while I hold the umbrella. (It has already turned inside out once which made me scream the "F" word and then look around to make sure no one heard me. They didn't...too damn windy to hear anything.) The kid comes up to me and announces that he thinks he has to go poopoo. Oh hell. I get the baby, and haul my butt up the stairs, wash the sand off my feet, wash the sand off the kids feet, legs and hands, put the baby in the house, and proceed to watch the kid poopoo. Lovely. T then announces he thinks he is finished with the beach. Oh hell no! Get that life jacket on before I strangle you with it! You will have fun, you will play in the waves and sand, and you'll do it til I tell you were going in. Oh the joy of vacations. So relaxing. No wonder we only do it once a year.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Where's The Beef?

Just got back last night from lovely Delta training. Let me just say, what a "F'ING" beating. I did fine. Made a 100 on all the tests. My Mama better be proud, I know how to call a pilot on a 747. Woohoo. Drank some wine with friends which made it so much more bearable. Thanks MG for bringing the hooch. I owe ya!

Now we are off to Destin. Yes, the day after coming back from training. I couldn't get my shit together until about 2:30. Give me a break, I packed for three and who knew babies needed so much junk? The trip started off fine. UNTIL we decided to drive thru Taco Cabana for lunch. So hungry after eating only donuts for breakfast. (And I wonder why I'm fat?) Anywho, we stop and I order 2 beef fajita tacos with guacamole. Yum Yum. The Husb orders some weird sounding beef thing that has melted cheese and peppers and stuff. It was the best option for driving and eating. I should of followed his lead. So, we get our food and head out on the highway. A couple of miles down the road after getting T and the Husb's food delivered, I dive into my delicious BEEF fajita taco. I'm just going to say it...there was no fucking beef on it. For that matter, there was no beef on either one. I don't think I've been that mad in ages. I don't know if it came from the stress of the last several days or what. I could have flipped out, but the children we're in the car. The Husb attempts to turn around, but hellll nooooo. We have a 12 hour drive ahead of us. We are not, I repeat are NOT wasting 30 minutes going back to Taco Cabana. (The one in Mesquite right before highway 80...fair warning). Anyone who has traveled with a baby knows that those extra 30 minutes in the car could ruin your day. I made myself feel a tiny bit better by calling and letting the manager know his staff had their head up their asses. Ok, I didn't say it like that but I thought about it.

But alas, the day has ended in bliss. We are now in Lafayette Louisiana. We drove thru the parking lot of two other hotels befor choosing the Baymont Inn & Suites. Funny how in your old age you become real picky about where you sleep. This place is awesome. The perfect mattress, mini frig, microwave, free breakfast, wifi, and nice...nice rooms. It's weird to find someplace like this on accident off the highway. Maybe my luck has changed!

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

I'm Bad!

Yes, I'm a bad blogger. Waiting this long to Blog. So sorry! We did have a busy Labor Day weekend. We usually go out to the lake, but because of me traveling a lot this month, we decided to stick closer to home. Had a great time chilling with some in town folks. Might have to skip the lake next year too. So, today I head out to the great state of Minnesota. As most people that don't live under a rock know...Delta is merging with Northwest. All of us Delta Drink Ladies/Gentlemen must go to training on 4 of their airplanes that we don't have. Me and my "Mommy Brain" will try to remember all the important parts and pass each test with an 85. If I was smart, I'd be more worried than I am. I'm going with two of my friends which should ease the pain. One is checking her suitcase, so she can fill it with wine for us. Damn, I love her.

Out of the 4 planes we are training on, three are Airbuses. Ya want to know what I know about the Airbus? It crashes. If I'm correct, one crashed in Queens NY right after 9-11 and the one headed to France from South America a few months ago. I have zero desire to work on one. Hummm...I wonder why? The other is a 747 that holds an ungodly number of passengers. Close to 400. That doesn't sound appealing either, well unless it's going to some fabulous location that I just have to see. Still not working an Airbus though.

I think I'm going to really miss my boys. As much as I bitch and complain about pee pee in the trash can and getting up at night, I sure am gonna be sad when I leave. I'll just have to keep remembering the day after I get back, we'll be spending 12 hours in the car driving to Destin. Bet I'll be over the missing by the time we get to Mississippi.

Well, until we meet again! As the singer Steve Miller says, "I'm leaving on a jet plane..."!

Wednesday, September 2, 2009


Pee pisses me off. So, this morning I'm getting ready as fast as I can to take Mr. T to Preschool. Before we leave, I tell him 3-4 times to go to the bathroom. Before having kids, I never dreamed I'd have to repeat myself all the time. I thought I'd save that til I was old and told the same stories over and over again. But no....I say the same thing over and over again every damn day. Can you tell it wears on me? Anyhow, T goes to the bathroom and before he can turn the light off and run out, I walk in and catch him red handed. First, the toilet seat is up which I have told him over and over to shut. Second, there's pee on the rim. (Hurray...he did lift the seat!). And finally the trash has pee in it. Not the "oh, I wasn't paying attention and peed a little in that direction kind". The kind that saturates all the tissue and paper that's in the trash. Mom was NOT HAPPY and in a hurry. T asked if I'm going to spank him. I don't spank that often but once reminded thought it was a fine idea. To all those none spanking parents, sorry...but really, piss in the trash can? A LOT of it too. So, I give him a few swats...nothing hard. And he says, "Oh...that didn't hurt at all" with a smile on his face. I turned and gave him "The Look" and the smile vanished. I should of started with "The Look", it's much more affective.

On the way to school, he promised to never do it again while claiming he didn't know why he did it. Ummm hummm. Just like the time he peed all over the bathroom rug. Yes, it did make the rug have cool little spots all over it. I think there may have been a time when he peed in the sink...I just couldn't prove it. Pee really does piss me off!

Monday, August 31, 2009

Zoo Landers!

T next to his Favorite!

Mr. T & Poppy!

Sounds like a movie huh? No, yesterday we got invited by some friends to the Ft. Worth Zoo. Due to it being the end of the month, the Husb had to do billing so he missed out. The friends we went with have two girls, 4 1/2 & 7. So happy to see that mine isn't the only 4+ that can't seem to hear. It warms my heart to hear other parents repeat, repeat, repeat! It wasn't just our was happening all over the zoo.

Mr. T had an awesome time. He was turbo excited. Cute and annoying at the same time. If I heard, "lets go see the penguins" once, I heard it a thousand times. Seriously....a thousand times. After lunch we finally saw the penguins. They smell like pee and when one pooped, it shot across the cage. So not Penguins of Madagascar cartoon. Five minutes after leaving the penguins, guess what Mr. T said? "Let's go see the penguins again". Lord help me.

I'll have to say, the Ft. Worth Zoo rocks. If I'd been invited to the Dallas Zoo, I would have declined. A friend once reminded me that the elephants there had been in the same small concrete pen since we were kids. (It's been a long long time since I was a kid!) Until that is fixed, which I think is being worked on, I won't be back. Reminds me of a circus. Won't go there either. The one thing I didn't like at the Ft. Worth Zoo is when I ordered chicken nuggets (the adult kind) that they were shaped like dinosaur feet or maybe it was bird feet. Weird and not very tasty.

Overall we had a great day. Poppy seemed to enjoy himself and his new stroller. The kids liked it , and best of all, we didn't stay too long. I think us parents got parenting points and had a good time. And for the record, my favorite animal is this really skinny deer looking thing. I think it was called a Kudu. Mr. T's favorite? You guessed it.....the penguins!

Saturday, August 29, 2009

You know your a redneck if....

You know your a redneck if ya go to a funeral and then change into yur Nascar t-shirt and go to a Trailer Trash party. Yes, that's basically what my sista and me are gonna do tonight. Actually the neighbor we had growing up pasted away and tonight the family is having a visitation. After going to that, we're going to swing by the house and change into our fanciest Nascar clothes and mini skirts. Is that sad or just plain trashy? Hey, at least we're not wearing the Nascar gear to the visitation. This is my cousins Third Annual Trailer Trash party. It will be my first time attending though. Somehow something was always scheduled the last two years. I'm bring my favorite boxed wine, Chester Cheetos Hot Fries and a few packs of Spam to Go. Bet you didn't know Spam was individually packed like those pockets of tuna. I swear I didn't either til today...really. I did read sometime this week that because of the economy, Spam sales have increased by like 30%. Damn, that's pretty sad. I'll have to say, I've never eaten Spam. I did love the occasional Deviled Ham sandwich when I was pregnant. Thinking about it now makes me say, "Eewww". I just might fit in quite well at this party as I love a good fried pork rind. Especially the Spicy Pork Rinds. Yummy! Well, I'm off to find my favorite blue eye shadow and nicest hoop earrings. I'll try to remember to bring the camera, the pictures should be interesting. Yes, we're leaving the Husbands behind. Poor guys don't know what they're miss'in! Nothin' hotter than a chick with Fungon breath.

I just wanted to add...please take no offense if you or family members live in a trailer. There is nothing wrong with it. The double wides are actually very nice. I have a cousin in Muskogee Oklahoma that sales manufactured homes if your in the market for one. Really.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Kids Do The Darndest Things

I know darndest isn't really a word. But it fits! I often wonder if I jacked up the house when I was a kid like Mr. T does. I'm so glad I like his name, since I say it no less than 100 times a day. A bunch of those times is in a scream. I've told the kid over and over not to take the duvet and sheets off my bed. What does he do you ask? Peel the sheets off the bed. Nothing makes my head spin like having to make the bed before going to bed. Well....picking all the sofa cushions off the floor is a close second. We let him watch TV in our room so I guess he feels like he can make himself at home. I really need to become more attentive!

Monday was the first day of school for most kids in this area. I just want to take a second to make fun of my Sister. Sorry Sis! She has three kids. She spaced them out so perfectly that for the next 2 years she has three kids at three different schools. I find this wildly funny. Sorry again Sis. I think my head spins around but hers spins off and flies around the room. I always have great advice on how to raise her kids. But really...what the hell do I know? I have four year old that basically does what I want (he is just a little scared of me!) and the other one doesn't talk.

Today T told me that he was taking a "beauty nap". I suppose he means he needs some beauty rest...but damn it made me laugh out loud. I also find it wildly hilarious that he pulls his pants down and walks thru the living room on his way to the bathroom. He's got a cute little white butt. I really need to get that on video for blackmailing in the teenage years.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Random Thoughts Tuesday

How do baby's get their feet dirty?

I love Sonic Vanilla Coke. I don't even want to know how many calories are in a large. I've cut back, I swear.

Who gets to pick the toys that go in kids meals? Can I have that job? McDonald's are the best, even though we hardly ever go there. (Thank God)

I have training in September for the new airplanes Delta is getting thru the Northwest merge. I wonder if I can make an 85 on all the test. I feel stupid after having these two kids and may actually have to study. Sure would be embarrassing to have to retake one.

My four year old says he doesn't love his baby brother & I have it on video. He's now in the baby's room playing with him. Hummm!

There are these guys that live a street over. They started landscaping their yard a month or so ago. I call it "The Less is More" house. I think they have used no less than 2 pallets of paving stones to build retaining walls, which are not needed. They recently added a metal arbor that goes over the side walk. Now they are digging a waist deep hole by the front of the house. There is a metal bridge sitting nearby. I think they are going for The Ugly Ass Yard of the Month award. They are well on their way. Boys...please stop!!!! Less really is more! I gotta get a picture to post. It's unbelievable.

I really like wine and am glad I'm not an alcoholic cause I like wine so much. (Don't have an addiction problem...that might help!)

I actually don't mind watching a little Spongebob now and then.

We went to the lake last Wednesday-Sunday. If you've read my previous posts, you'll know that my cats get pissy when we're gone. Literally. Last night while having dinner I could swear I smelled pee. I have been know to have a Bionic nose. I ask the Husb if he thinks the napkins smell like pee. He says no...but he can't smell worth a damn. I get up and get another napkin. (Pee-less napkin) Hate to tell ya Husb, always always trust my nose. A cat pissed on the napkin holder. Lovely.

I'm addicted to reality TV shows. (I lied about the addiction thing.) I long for the days when Biggest Loser, The Amazing Race and Survivor start. I actually check a Big Brother Spoiler site more than once a day and have called a friend to asked what happened while we were outta town. One of my favorite things to do is eat something really fattening while watching Biggest Loser and eat crab legs while watching Deadliest Catch.

Sometimes my baby snores and he sounds like a tiny version of his Daddy.

I love caller ID and don't know if I could live without it. Can you believe some people actually answer the phone and don't know who it is first.

I feel old sometimes when I think of the things we had as kids. (I'll let ya in on a secret, I'll be 40 in November...a young 40!) I remember Eight Track Players, cell phones that came in a big case, Atari that came with Pac Man, Frogger & Space Invaders. No caller ID! Not having to wear a seat belt and sitting in the front seat as a kid. Riding in the back of my Paw Paw's truck on the highway. Bet ya can't do that now! Parachute pants...not the kind my niece thinks I'm talking about. Sun-In, Members Only jackets, ribbon belts, Twist-a-Beads, and jelly shoes. Some of these things I've seen recently. Wow.

It's funny how my mind goes on and on and on! I guess I should go now and see what is broken in my bedroom. The kid has been unattended for entirely too long.